Much of this book has focused around the use of language. I've given you structures and patterns for how to shape what you say—syntax—and I've also emphasized the use or non-use of certain words and phrases that affect how your message is received—semantics. Let's now explore another topic area that can affect the impact that your feedback has; your emotional state. By this I mean the sum total of how you are thinking, feeling, and behaving at the time that you have your conversation. Your emotional state is probably the biggest performance driver for any endeavor that you carry out, so it makes sense to ensure that it's a positive and focused one. If you've ever watched a tennis player just before match point, a football player before a penalty kick, or a boxer enter the ring, you'll notice that they are in a very focused and determined state just before the critical moment.

Athletic performance requires certain states of mind that have some similarities with the...